Don't let a higher position or new level of approval change your attitude and approach to others. Often people win more authority with obsequious deceit; and when they assume the new role go to the opposite extreme with surly, irritating, unapproachable arrogance. They get revenge for having to please everyone by making everyone irritated and angry. The more power we receive, the more approachable we should become. Being unapproachable communicates a deep lack of self-knowledge, and self-confidence; a judgment that we don't deserve the position.

Don't bore people with irrelevant details. Too much technical jargon loses people's attention while obscuring the essential issues. Short and to-the-point descriptions lead to effective and timely action while too much talk with irrelevant issues only obscures focus and slows progress. When good and short, statements become twice as effective. And when something isn't said well, if short it won't be as bad. Rambling, pointless trivia increases in inappropriateness in ratio to the level and importance of the person listening. Be particularly careful not to become a talking nuisance to busy people with heavy weights of responsibility—well said is quickly said.

Doing harm to yourself in order to please another does not describe true compassion but rather a perverted understanding. True compassion requires intelligence and understanding of the entire situation. Creating pain for ourselves in order to calm or give pleasure to another can help a small segment but harm the whole. Instead, look ahead and avoid problems whenever possible. Unless clearly beneficial, neither give nor receive bad news. Protect your ears from the sick sweetness of flattery, the perverse bitterness of scandal, the depressing entertainment of sensationalist bad news. (cf. #163)

Do what can’t be done by doing things,
Let action be effortless.
Make what can’t be made by making things,
Savor the tasteless.
Treat the small as large,
The few as many.
Repay wrongs with the Power of Goodness.

Work on problems before they become big,
Study the complicated while it’s still obvious.
The biggest challenge starts out easy,
The most renowned projects
Begin small and uncomplicated.

Since taking things too lightly creates big problems
And thinking things too easy makes them difficult,
The wise don’t make much ado about anything,
Don’t take to heart what they can throw over their shoulders,
Don’t believe or like lightly.
By never attempting great ventures,
They accomplish great goals.

Do not show your wounded finger, for everything will knock up against it. The wise never confess to being hit. If you wish the one to cease and the other to endure, never disclose the source of pain or of joy. Complaining only makes us into a target for malice to shoot against because ill will searches for wounds to inflame. The wise hide harmful events and experiences—personal, biological, business—never nurturing with attention and talk memories best forgotten.

Decision-making and sound judgment based on careful reasoning brings us halfway to success. Some—born with this natural advantage—avoiding everything frivolous, prejudicial, and lacking forethought, rise high in social, organizational, and political influence. Their innate common sense takes them to respected and deserved positions of leadership.

Culture grows from the ground of courtesy, manners, and politeness. These qualities win regard and affection, cost little, gain a great deal, and bring honor. Discourtesy and rudeness, however, invite opposition, scorn, and even contempt. Too much politeness and indiscriminate courtesy though degenerates into superficial hypocrisy and can even bloat into injustice. Courtesy toward an enemy displays your integrity and may decrease aggression. Instead of being lost by being given away, gallantry and respect grow.

Complicated, confusing, and dangerous difficulties easily becomes worse after an ill-considered remark or gesture. The wise instead extricate themselves with skillful evasions, elegant jokes, witty remarks, warm smiles, changing the subject, or pretending to not understand. Potentially serious conflicts submerge when intriguing diversions arise. These methods can also skillfully ease the pain of refusals. Sometimes the most clear understanding leads to acting like we don't understand.

Close friends become like one soul in two bodies; your shared values and goals flow through accomplishing much more than you could do alone. Our social value depends on public opinion that depends on the goodwill generated by either the service and friendliness we extend to others or the enmity of enemies. Each day search for a new friendship or at least more relationships that wish us well. In this pursuit, there is no magic like an unexpected good turn, an understanding word in a difficult conversation, an unasked for support.

Cleverness seduces us with quick rewards and easier successes. But these remain vulnerable and easily reverse. Wisdom takes a slower, more thoughtful, but stronger and more deeply rooted approach. Even a small amount of genuine wisdom goes much further than a deluge of clever but superficial exploits. This understanding extends to all of our words, thoughts, and deeds and—although it doesn't often entice immediate applause—it wins approval from the wise which is the true benchmark of genuine success.

Clear insight arising from awareness avoids danger and accomplishes even the most difficult of tasks. This kind of confidence transcends reason, quickly finds solutions and the most appropriate response to even complicated and confusing dilemmas. Too much thought however can dissipate intuition and lead to deeds based on theory instead of the immediate experience. Reflection that uses but doesn't depend on thinking takes advantage of momentary uniqueness, acts at the best time, and often succeeds without effort.

Chains of cause and effect multiply from every action set in motion. The foolish see only the first link in this set, quickly commit, and get blindsided by the next-step consequences. The wise realize the distance and difficulty between taking on a new project and it becoming successful, take time to contemplate before acting, and avoid committing themselves unless they see a clear and valuable, multi-step process forward. Sometimes declining obligations requires more strength of character than accepting them. Rather than being led on by herd-instinct conformity, the prudent watch and let the fools rush in.

Carefully going forward with foresighted caution can become a clear expression of wisdom, confer great advantage, and assure success. Caution however commonly appears as cunning which readily arouses distrust, hatred, and a myriad of unexpected problems. For this reason, the more clever the strategy, the more critical to conceal it. Be shrewd, reflect, plan, and distrust but keep your suspicions hidden. Blending this kind of foresighted planning with an inscrutable outward expression develops the most skillful and appropriate action.

Carefully avoid all foolish ventures, in particular all those disreputable schemes that may bring an audience and notoriety but also disdain and loss of reputation. Eccentricity has its attractions and rewards but this attention can quickly become ridicule; the spotlight most often only brings laughter and disrespect. And since the path of right livelihood and wisdom often crosses status quo values and norms, the wise carefully cultivate anonymity and avoid public notice.

By always seeking the most lowly position,
Oceans can welcome and receive all rivers and streams.
In this way the wise, by placing themselves lower than others
Gain the most respect and influence.
They teach and guide by listening.
They lead by following behind.

For these reasons,
When the wise are in charge,
The people don’t feel oppressed.
When the wise are in front,
The people don’t feel blocked.

The world never tires of praising
And appreciating this kind of leader.
Because they don’t struggle or compete,
They have no competition.

Break to become whole,
Twist to become straight,
Empty to become full,
Wear out to become new,
Have little to gain much,
With much, you gain only confusion.
The wise therefore embrace non-duality
And use that to shepherd the world.

Not showing off, they shine brightly.
Not justifying themselves, they gain respect.
Not defining themselves, they become new.
Not bragging and parading themselves, they lead.
Not flattering themselves, their success endures.

Not competing,
In all the world they have no competition.
As the old masters taught,
Surrender to overcome.
By returning, you become whole.

Born with humanity's lawless nature formed from millions of years hunting, fighting, and killing; only culture raises us above this lawless barbarism. Aggressive violence and self-serving greed helped humans survive in a hostile environment with ferocious animals and neighbors. And though now the environment has radically changed, those same basic human impulses remain. Civilization only arises when these remain in check and culture inspires the means for that accomplishment. Culture defines the person, polishes conversation, and creates a more refined, better world.

Better to never compete. Most competition begins with belittling an opponent and looks for support and ammunition everywhere it can—not only where it should. And this abuse easily escalates into a hatred and revenge that seeks out and reveals old failings, damages reputations, and spotlights old scandals. While good manners and courtesy puts up with and excuses mistakes and misconduct, competition invents and exaggerates them. The competitive seldom find success with their strategies of insult, libel, and slander; normally, it only harms their cause and their reputation—while doing little to stop or slow their aggression. People with goodwill live in peace and people with integrity have goodwill.

Believing in "good" or "bad" luck projects agency and makes people feel like victims, trapped with no escape. The wise understand the rules of "luck" and don't leave things to chance. Being wise welcomes "lucky", being foolish "unlucky." Only integrity and insight create the true situation of good fortune.

Before acting, take a deep, second look at your decisions exposing them to your inner court of reflection. This lets more information filter in giving more confidence for choices without much clarity. It injects time for more verification and proof. It instills more appreciation for gifts that become more valued because more well-considered. The longer anticipated, the more highly appreciated. When you have to communicate a denial, a rejection, a disapproval; more time allows emotions to dissipate, a better time and place to emerge, and more possibilities for softly saying no and arousing less bitterness. The more pressed for an answer, the more beneficial a delay.